I just wrote a long post that turned out way to personal and negative. I did come to some insights though. That's good. Although I feel they keep coming to me over and over, as if I need to understand the same thing over and over. Anyhow. I'm going trough all my stuff right now, throwing out and out what I no longer want in my energy field. There are a few items I rather trade or give away or something instead of just throwing out. However I have some troubles finding a steady energy stream for doing so. I thought about depop. Maybe just take the things I feel someone else would enjoy. I just feel it's a bit sad to throw out or give to charity when I get the sense that in the depop way someone who truly would get joy out of a few of those items. At the same time it's just things it's when I get into those thoughts that the energy for it goes away. SO I will save a few and throw out the rest or give to chraity and see if the energy for it comes.
Would really like to find some carpets to put over my floor. OOh but I keep getting in conflict with me not wanting to stay where I'm staying. Wouldn't it be lovely to live in a van? A tiny house on wheels. I suppose since I do not have a partner in time at this point in time I would need a drivers license before taking that step. I also feel I should be happy with what I got BUT while writing the post before this that I deleted it came to me that I would not eat food I did not like if I could eat food I did like, so why woud I have my apartment in a way I don't like when I can have it in a way I do like? And let's be honest, when we like and match our environment we do feel better! The walls here are white and I like to have fabrics and stuff all over or something. Not even sure. Still, it looks pretty nice here. Going to make it even cosier though. Since I spend so much time alone in my apartment, especially now when it's getting colder it would be really, REALLY nice to feel super at home where I live. Even if I feel that I want to live somewhere else. Soul family where are you? Mh guess I might need to get that van and go out and find you!